Unconventional Methods
by Just A Passing Through Writer
Summary: After an invention of Lisa's goes wrong she finds herself in a terrible situation, having tampered in a domain no scientist dares to, the creation of life. What will she do? How will the family react? Will she keep it a secret? (One-shot.)


**A/N: I don't know if I'm doing the authors note thingy right but, I wanted to say sorry if this is bad. I've never really had much experience writing, the only tips I've had were from online searches... Let me know what you think, I won't get anywhere without criticism after all. (That was one of the tips, yes.)**

* * *

Royal Woods was a small town in Michigan. It was a rather peaceful place, the type of town that many dreamed about raising a family. Rarely were there any natural threats. The weather would not change without warning. And despite the town's size, the populace could do hundreds of activities around here. The Loud family fit that description of the perfect type of imperfect family living in Royal Woods. With a total of ten children, nine girls and one boy, their parents did the best they could to raise them all, and as far as they cared, life was great despite the stress and worry that came with raising so many children.

It was a late afternoon, and most of the Loud family were away, at a glorified party. Only the youngest child, Lisa Loud, and the parents, Rita and Lynn Sr, were in the two-story home at that time.

"Lisa, honey, is everything okay?" Rita chimed up, peeking her head into the room that the three youngest siblings all shared.

"Yes, mother. I'm just preparing to run a test. That's all," Lisa answered, her voice lisping laterally. The young girl had brown hair and thick glasses, a green sweater was snug around her. She had earned a PhD at such an early age, since her intelligence had reportedly far surpassed any other toddler in Michigan, as well as many high school or college students. Yet that did not stop her parents from worrying about all the experiments she did. It was so much so that the Loud parents had to make a rule about not testing on family members or pets, not that it stopped her from trying to do it secretly in trade for favors.

"Do you need me to help you with anything?" Rita offered, but their youngest child shook her head.

"Don't worry, mother. There's nothing remotely dangerous about this test… even if it took nearly six months to just prepare," Lisa adjusted her glasses, looking at the decently sized machine taking up the corner of the room, that had three separate chambers. She had made a secret hiding spot within the walls for this invention. It got her a month-long grounding when her parents found out, but it was worth it to her.

"Alright… and you're sure you didn't want to go with the others to go bowling? I don't mind taking you there," the dentist assistant offered. She did not want their youngest child to feel left out after all the rest of their family had gone bowling, when their only sons best friend Clyde had invited them. Everyone loved the idea since it sounded like an easy and enjoyable way to take this Friday night.

"I'm too weak to carry any of the bowling balls, anyhow… there's no need to worry for me. I'll call you if something transpires, or if I change my mind," Lisa brushed off the offer as she walked over to the control panel on the machine. The middle chamber was closed while the sides were wide open, waiting for something to be placed inside of each of them.

"Alright, honey. Just remember. The second emergency fire extinguisher is in your closet," the Loud family mother reminded the youngest child. Fires weren't exactly common, but with a family as crazy as the Louds, the parents decided it would be best to have at least five fire extinguishers scattered across the house. It was a great safety precaution to them.

"Thank you, mom," the child prodigy did not change her straight face. Her mother went out of the door afterwards. With her away, the young prodigy closed the door, and then she pulled out a small tape recorder from her pocket, which she used to record her research and everything else. It was an outdated method for logging information, but it was the most secure way as far as she cared.

"Beginning the preparation of safety protocol for Experiment 319," Lisa reached up and flipped the light switch over. Watching a red button and green button on the back of it appear. She pressed the red one. Watching the door be covered in a firm material that looked like air tight durable plastic, as if to keep any possible dangerous chemicals from escaping through.

"Ventilation should be limited from my room now as well…" Lisa pressed the green button next, watching her slightly older twin sisters' beds get covered in the same material as well to keep the sleeping facilities safe. The rest of the furniture in the room became covered up as well.

"Room has been completely secured. Oxygen supply should last for approximately two and a half hours," Lisa sat the tape recorder down for a moment as she went and rummaged through one of her drawers full of tools, pulling out an oxygen mask and a pair of goggles that she wasted no time in putting on in place of her glasses.

"Vision has been impaired by sixty percent due to the removal of my spectacles, but I do not need to see that far for this anyway," Lisa continued speaking as she put the tape recorder in her shirt pocket. She was short sighted when it came to her vision, but she did not pay it much mind, this experiment being tested did not need her to be able to see from a far distance away.

"I began creating this invention five months ago when my oldest sister, Lori Loud, got into a small vehicular accident with our family's van. Also classified as _'Vanzilla'_. The damage was minor to the vehicle, but the driver side door was bent far inward. It had cut her side wide open," Lisa began to make sure the settings on the machine were set correctly.

"The result of this inevitably was an infection that somehow managed to make its way to her liver. The doctors informed us that she would need a transplant due to the organ beginning to shut down… most of our family offered to donate parts of their liver, but she was in dire need of a full transplant. Otherwise, the partial transplanted organ would be destroyed by the infection as well. The doctors described it as _'kicking a can down the road'_ ," Lisa's voice shook a little from reiterating the story, the doctor's words from back then still rooted in her head.

"So, all we could do was wait and hope… Hope that someone with a matching blood type died so that we could harvest their insides. I know that is a very grim perspective for such a matter, but unfortunately, the same drama goes on for most waiting transplants who fear the worst," the child prodigy went over to a cabinet in the room, meant for hiding toys during punishments. She began rummaging through it, looking for something specific, she used it for storage purposes since anything confiscated from her tended to be too dangerous to put anywhere but the garage.

"Thankfully, by some large break in our family's somehow incredible luck, Lori's body fought off the infection. But, as I thought about it all, the whole situation left me realizing how horribly strained the system for organ transplants are… the old get often left for death. Yet newborns and young children have far less hope. Due to many paternal figures' inability to relinquish their selfish desires for deceased individuals," Lisa had to stop herself from going into a rambling fit. Sometimes her vast knowledge with psychology got the better of her.

"All the same… that is what led to this invention. I call it the O.R.D. Which stands for Organ Replication Device. Its name should describe it quite accurately, but to put it simply, this invention of mine I created can replicate organs from mere pieces, as long as they have the correct blood types… in theory, it can replicate limbs as well, but that is something I refuse to test anytime soon," Lisa though was beginning to ask herself if her sanity was intact whenever she recorded these audio logs. Mainly because when she listened back to them, it made her sound like a mad scientist. She guessed that was how a lot of scientists felt in general when trying to create progress.

"During the device's creation, I managed to gather some materials from two of my siblings, Lincoln and Lori Loud, hair and blood are those two things gathered," the child prodigy looked down at the four sample containers holding the hair and blood samples separately, they were quite easy to gather, stress made Lori tear her own hair out and Lincoln seemed to be quite oblivious to everything around him when he slept, making it easy to snip some away from his messy unkempt head. She had carefully gathered the blood samples from one of the many family fights.

"I won't deny that I'm treading in a rather hideous domain and going against many ethics with this invention alone… I have no doubt that this device would be used illegally, no matter whose hands it fell inside… but frankly, as long as it can help save lives, I can't bring myself to care for any necessary evils that may transpire," Lisa placed the hair and blood samples into the two chambers respectively before she pulled a small lever, causing the chamber doors to close and lock tightly.

"I did not chose my only brother and oldest sister randomly for this test. The one primary reason for it is due to their age differences. It should have no effect on the test, but it should be able to combine the genetics for the purest result," she began inputting the commands, being careful to make sure she did not make any mistakes. One wrong key pressed could spell disaster, but her excitement was making her hands feel unsteady.

"For this test I'm going to create a larger set of hair from these samples. Essentially the simplest thing that can be done… I was going to use test mice, but unfortunately, our cat Cliff has not caught any recently, and my last few escaped their containment somehow and have yet to be located, presumed to have escaped the home entirely." Lisa finished inputting the last of the needed commands. She took a few steps away before hiding behind one of the beds, the best thing she had for a safety area, she then began taking out a remote.

"If my calculations are correct, the result of this will be just very long hair… there are a few chemicals inside the machine to help accelerate the growth, but it's nothing requiring my hazmat gear… then again, six percent of my body is radioactive from my last experiment when I said that exact thing," Lisa continued. She had no denial for her excitement to get this test underway, even if her face did not express it.

"Alright. Beginning Test Number 1 of Experiment 319," the super genius, after saying that, hit several of the many buttons on the remote and then began turning a small knob on the side. Once it was done, the O.R.D could be heard beginning to whir to life.

The sound of the O.R.D was almost as loud as a jet turbine. Lisa wished she could have had a camera installed within the primary chamber where the created item should appear, but there was no way to do so without interrupting the organ replication process.

"So far, there are no sounds of concern. It seems both samples have disappeared from within their respective chambers, which is a good sign," Lisa spoke into the tape recorder as she watched from afar as the machine worked its scientific magic. However, a warning signal appeared on the remote.

"An error…?" she blinked at the top of the remote. A bright red message reading _**ERROR**_ flashed.

"An unknown complication has transpired, I am going to activate the emergency shutdown procedure," Lisa tried to not panic. She began to work the various buttons and knobs on the remote. However, there was no response. The O.R.D was not even slowing down. The auburn-haired girl dropped the remote and hurriedly ran up to the machine itself, trying to shut it down by utilizing the control panel itself.

"I don't know what's happening… everything should be working properly. The samples were pure… I know hair is not technically an organ, but I do not recall programming a machine to disagree with commands," Lisa stammered for the tape recorder to hear. She tended to talk aloud to herself when in a panic and trying to brainstorm.

"…I should not have tried to test this for another month," the youngest Loud sister reached that conclusion and felt an immense wave of disappointment wash over herself. She could not get the O.R.D to respond to any command, no matter what she tried, and the only way to cut off the power would be to turn off the circuit breaker in the garage. Not that she had enough time left to do that.

"Ending log for test number one of Experiment 319. Conclusion? Failure. Reason? My own excitement for wanting to help the world making a fool of me? I don't know!... I am now going to take cover, for this machine is going to explode in approximately one minute and twenty-two seconds." Lisa turned off the tape recorder after that. Her eyes were locked onto the machine spewing smoke. The young girl went and hid behind the table on the opposite side of the room after flipping it onto its side of course. She roughly pressed her hands on the sides of her head to cover her ears, as she waited for the inevitable.

Despite being only a minute and twenty-two seconds, it felt like an eternity, eventually a loud explosion soon erupted from the machine, shaking the floor as well as sending parts of it flying everywhere and releasing clouds of smoke that engulfed the whole room. Another explosion rocked the room afterwards. Lisa presumed that both chambers had turned to the shrapnel that once was sturdy metal.

Lisa hit a button that immediately opened all the windows in the room and unsealed the air vents to begin quickly draining the smoke out into the outside air.

"Luckily, there seems to be nothing chemically dangerous exposed to the air… the room has not taken any significant damage either," the young girl took her goggles off, putting on her glasses once the smoke cleared a decent amount.

"Lisa! Lisa is everything alright?! The whole house felt like it had an earthquake hit," Lynn Sr. pounded on the door frantically. Once the smoke was mostly cleared, Lisa took off her oxygen mask as she went to the door, hitting the button to release the safety cover. The door opened to reveal her parents standing there.

"Oh, thank goodness you're okay!" Rita hugged their youngest daughter, feeling very relieved.

"Honey, what happened?" the Loud family father asked, looking ready to lose the rest of his hair because of that scare.

"What you heard was the sounds of six months of effort ending in catastrophic failure," the child prodigy simply replied, while being crushed in her mother's arms.

"Don't worry, it's alright now… there's no need to cry," Lynn Sr. reassured while he rubbed her back with one hand. However, it took the child genius a moment before she registered said sound. It was the kind of light wailing a new-born child would make. She had not heard it until now due to being lost in her thoughts.

"Dad _that's_ … That's not me," Lisa claimed. She could not deny that she was on the verge of breaking down and crying, mainly from realizing that this experiment was her greatest failure by far. Rita looked to her husband with a worried look in her eyes, despite trying to have a reassuring expression for the child prodigy.

"I'll go look," Lynn Sr. told them. Since the room seemed safe now, he decided to check it out in place of them. Lisa could feel her anxiety skyrocketing when the pieces began connecting within her head.

"Rita… we need to go to the hospital," the Loud father's unsteady voice sounded.

" _Wh-why?_ What happened, Lynn?" Rita hesitantly asked.

 _"…the malfunction of the machine was far greater than I anticipated,"_ Lisa thought as she stared wide-eyed, when her father returned from the younger kids' room. A baby girl was now snug in his arms. She looked to be almost new-born. The Loud family mother looked ready to faint upon seeing her.

" _R-right._ I'll get the keys," Rita ran off in a hurry. Lisa was simply staring in awe at the small baby in her father's arms, crying as loud as the family's namesake, but she seemed fine, at least on the externally.

"Lisa, go get one of the spare blankets from the hall closet and come on. I don't want you to be home alone," Lynn Sr. insisted. It took a moment for his youngest daughter to register his words. She nodded slowly before letting him go to the car. Lisa's mind felt broken into practical shards.

 _"I've crossed a line no scientist was meant to cross… the machine did not make hair, but an entire living being?"_ Lisa tried to hold herself together as she went to fetch the blanket, so she could hurry to the car.

* * *

Lynn Sr. was focusing on driving, taking the fastest route he could to the hospital. He had driven his wife there enough to know the quickest methods to get there. The drive seemed to be enough to make the baby girl quiet down, though that silence was more worrying than anything else.

"Lisa… please tell us what you were trying to do in your room," Rita was cradling the baby girl wrapped up in a blanket in her arms. Their youngest daughter was lost in her own thoughts, her eyes affixed to the floorboard.

"Lisa, honey, I know you're probably shaken from the, _uh…_ explosion, but please don't ignore your mother," Lynn Sr. managed to snap their daughter out of her daze.

"Hm? Apologies… The experimental test I was performing was simply an attempt at creating long hair out of two different small hair and blood samples," Lisa's eyes were unchanging, though they still were full of remorse.

"That big machine was for making hair?" the Loud family mother found that a little hard to believe. Ridiculous in her mind, but that was one of many words that could describe their family as a whole.

"I created that machine to generate organs to help those awaiting donation… I decided upon designing it after the incident where Lori almost lost her liver," Lisa's explanation seemed to be a lot more understandable now. They felt sorry for their youngest daughter. They had no clue how strongly that terrible part of their lives had been stuck in her mind.

"I guess the first test didn't go too well?" Lynn Sr. did not mean to sound like a jerk with that wording, but he could not think of any other words to describe the situation.

"Evidently the outcome contained far better results than ever anticipated… Ironically though, there is only one strand of hair on the baby's head," Lisa pointed out the single strand of blonde hair stood out prominently. The irony in the situation was not too much of a mood brightener.

"But yes… due to my excitement, I tested a machine that needed far more preparations before it should have ever been turned on… as result of my own idiocy, it malfunctioned and created an entire living being," Lisa exclaimed. She was not bringing up her internal fears of the baby's wellbeing, her mental status, her organs' health… though it all made the child genius terrified that she accidentally created a life that would inevitably end in under a week. If it did, then she was a murderer in her own eyes.

"Don't be so hard on yourself, Lisa. You were trying to do something good. We know that… remember what you always told us?" Rita chirped. She hated to hear her daughter be so tough on herself. Yet she hated to imagine how hard it was to be so young and have such a high intelligence.

"…That neither scientists nor their creations are good or evil. It depends on how people use them," Lisa reiterated what she had said many times before. The atmosphere was a lot lighter now, but it was still horridly tense.

"Hey, I just had a thought," the fatherly Loud suddenly felt something important cross his mind.

"That you ran past four red lights and somehow have not been seen by a single police officer by some miracle?" the child prodigy guessed, but her father shook his head. He was fully aware of his poor following of traffic rules, but he was going to take advantage of everything he could, if it got them to their destination faster than waiting for the lights to go green.

"No, not that…" Lynn Sr. replied, "Who's hair and blood did you use in that test?"

Lisa took of her glasses to clean them since they were still somewhat dirtied from the smoke the O.R.D had produced.

"Lincoln and Lori," she answered, her face remaining blunt, and put her glasses on again.

"Please, Lynn… Please don't tell me we're thinking the same thing," Rita said as she mentally prayed.

"Indeed. That baby you're holding is technically Lincoln and Loris child," Lisa acknowledged their fears. The parental Louds knew this was something that most parents had nightmares about, but never under this kind of circumstance. They did not even know if this counted as incest or not. Nevertheless, they found a good reason why Lisa was immensely upset with herself now.

"Well, don't worry. It's not your fault… _or theirs…_ " Rita had to say so to reassure herself that nothing concerning was transpiring between their children. Lincoln was not going to be twelve years old for another eight months. Imagining it alone made the mother want to black out.

"No… it is entirely my fault… there's no denial of this," Lisa mused, "I've entered a domain no one should be allowed to enter. I created life that did not ask to exist." Her parents had no clue how to respond to that, they doubted they could change her mind.

"What should we do with her then? We can't just ask Lincoln and Lori if they want to raise a baby… Lori's only had a boyfriend for a month!" the Loud father was on the verge of a mental snap from this headache inducing mess. He swore every other day his family somehow found a new way to outdo themselves, whether that be for better or worst.

"We've always said no matter how many children we've had that we would never put any up for adoption, because we knew we'd be the best for them, no matter how bad things are," Rita added. She saw child adoption as gambling for both the parents and the children. The only time they ever had the adoption conversation was when they had conceived Leni, because they had been in a very financially tight situation.

"I want to take responsibility for her," Lisa's suddenly spoke for the conversation, her straight face broken in place of one clearly filled with determination.

"Lisa, you're too young to even consider doing that…" Lynn Sr. appreciated the sentiment, but he could not see someone her age, no matter how big her IQ was, taking that much responsibility.

"…I have a better idea," the motherly Loud's voice chimed up, grabbing their attention.

"I think I know what you're going to say," the Loud father gulped.

"Yeah… Why don't we just say we're her parents?" Rita suggested. The fatherly Loud initially did not agree with this, but he sighed after a moment of thought.

"Our only options are adoption or raising her ourselves, huh…? I can't imagine telling Lincoln or Lori about this either," Lynn Sr. huffed out an exasperated breath. If they told Lincoln and Lori about it, they would try to take responsibility as well, but they were both far too young for it, and Lori's newfound relationship would end before it progressed anywhere they assumed.

"We wouldn't be raising her ourselves, Lynn. Every child we've had has had all of their older sisters and brother helping, and we both know Lisa would also do her best to help," Rita claimed, trying to be positive with it. The motherly Loud could not deny that she felt herself bonding with the baby as if she was her own already, but she did not want to imagine the thought of leaving the glorified newborn in some poorly run adoption clinic.

"I want to agree Rita, but you sure don't look like you've given birth, and we'd probably be suspected of kidnapping if we said that, then we would definitely not be able to get near the little one," Lynn claimed. They would not be allowed anywhere near the accidentally created new-born then if they had any form of accusation of committing a criminal act laid out before them. They were beginning to arrive to the hospital, able to see it in the distance.

"…Leave that to me," Lisa adjusted her glasses with a small smirk. "Dad, grab that emergency makeup kit from the trunk. Help Mom look paler. You keep the lie up and make sure it looks genuine on the surface, while I'll handle making it look genuine internally," Lisa reassured. She would let nothing bad happen to the baby. She looked at the baby in their mother's arms, before she reached up and rubbed her hand gently across her head.

"No matter how you were created, we'll treat you great in this family," Lisa hummed. Her parents were caught off guard by how she was behaving, they never had seen Lisa break that straight face of hers in such a significant way, seeing her be so emotional was surprising. But they were going to put their faith in her for this plan she had just came up with, they really did not have the largest options at their choosing.

* * *

The bowling alley that the rest of the Loud family were spending time at was not that far away from home, barely a few miles into town. Everyone was having fun.

"Jeez… I can't feel my arms…" Lincoln Loud, the peacekeeper, staggered over to one of the seats near the snack bar, rubbing his arms sorely.

"Maybe you got too heavy of a ball?" Clyde McBride chimed up, bringing him over a bottle of water. They could see that everyone was having a good time. The McBride was quite happy that the invitation to the Loud family was not a mistake. Beforehand he was half expecting a quarrel that would destroy the bowling alley.

"No, that's not it… I have to help Lola and Lana bowl too, since they didn't have any lighter weight balls left," Lincoln responded. The two second-youngest twins needed his help to even try to swing the bowling ball. He gladly helped, but it was quite exhausting either way. "Thanks for the water, dude," Lincoln smiled as he took the water and began to drink from it. He was trying to relax for the moment while his oldest sisters, Lori and Leni, helped in his place, though he could already hear Lori complaining about breaking a nail.

"So that's all your sisters here, right?" Clyde wondered.

"Not all of them. I tried to convince Lisa to come, so she'd get out of the house for once, but she said she was too busy…" Lincoln exclaimed. No matter what he tried, it did not work. Even when their other sisters asked her to come, Lisa just stayed firm. They did not know why. They assumed that she might be feeling sick.

"Don't worry. There's always next time. Even if it isn't bowling, there'll be something you can find to get her interest," Clyde reassured. It would not be the last chance his best friend had to try and bring Lisa along for some of the fun as well.

"Trust me. The only thing she's interested in is science… maybe she's sick of the things she was interested in? I don't know… I just don't want her to feel left out, y'know?" Lincoln responded his brotherly best friend nodded, understanding completely. Even if he was an only child, he would not want to be left out of the fun if he had an older sibling. "Hm?" the only Loud boy had his attention grabbed by a ringing sound emitting from his pocket. He grabbed his cellphone and put to his ear.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Lincoln, _uh…_ how are things going there?" Lynn Sr. Chimed up over the phone, sounding nervous.

"It's great! Everyone's having a lot of fun," Lincoln happily replied, though was confused by some of the background noise coming from his dad's phone. "Is something wrong?" he quirked. The odd variety of noises sounded like a hospital.

"No, not really… We're… at the hospital, we had to take your mom in," the Loud family father wanted to break the news right off the bat, but he was trying to at least be easy with the nonetheless shocking news.

"What? Is she okay?" Lincoln stood up, ready to go inform their other family members.

"She's been through a lot… Lincoln, try not to scream when I tell you this, please," Lynn Sr. Requested, aware the news would probably be that shocking.

His son looked to his best friend with fear. "Okay…?"

"Your mom had a baby," Lynn Sr. Announced.

"Wh…what?" the bucktoothed kid's eyes widened. He wondered if he had misheard that.

"Apparently, your mother was pregnant, and didn't know…" the father explained the best he could, "Can you round up your sisters and come over? We can trust you to tell all of them in a way that it won't shock them all… too much."

" _Y…_ yeah, I will, dad… Bye," Lincoln hung up.

"What happened, dude?" Clyde inquired, worried from his best friend's expression alone.

"I have a sister apparently," Lincoln was not really thinking that much when he spoke, clearly still absorbing the information he had received.

His close friend raised his eyebrow. "…did you hit your head when none of us were looking, dude?"

"No, I didn't…" Lincoln held his head, "I have a tenth sister now. My mom just gave birth."

"You never told me your parents were planning on having another kid." His friend stared.

"They weren't… but apparently, life had other plans," Lincoln had no other way to word it. He hopped out of his seat and walked over to his other family members. "Guys! Hey guys!" Lincoln called for them, but his voice was drowned out by the sound of balls rolling down the lane and crashing into pins.

"Is something wrong, Lincoln?" Luna, his aspiring rock star sibling, asked, since she heard him from nearby.

"Oh, Luna! Perfect! Uh, yeah… Dad just called. He said mom's in the hospital," the young boy thought it was great that he got the sister with the loudest voice. He was sure that with her help, he would be able to get the others' attention easily.

"What?! Is she alright?" Luna worriedly asked.

"I don't know…" he shrugged, "She had another baby," the news made his older sister's jaw drop. "So, uh… can you help me get the others? Dad wants us to get to the hospital as soon as we can," he wondered if the guitarist had any ideas on how to get everyone else's attention quickly. It would take a good amount of time to go to them one by one, especially if everyone reacted like her.

"Huh? Oh yeah, just leave it to me, bro," Luna snapped out of it. At least she seemed happy at the news. She rubbed his head, messing up his hair slightly before getting up and whistling loudly. "Hey! Everyone!" her voice was strong enough to pierce the rest of the noise.

"Aw! You messed up my throw!"

"Guess you _'struck out'_."

"Please stop, Luan, before I knock myself out with one of these bowling balls…"

"I think I threw my ball into someone else's lane."

"I don't know where my ball went."

"Leni, you never had one, you've spent the whole time here trying to find the right sized bowling shoes."

"What is it, Luna?" Lori asked, unhappy with the big interruption.

"Chill, dude! It's great news! Mom had a baby!" Luna announced. Lincoln plugged his ears.

 ** _"WHAT?!"_** They all shrieked in unison.

* * *

"Seems like mom and dad have done well on their part…" Lisa was relieved. She was walking through the halls of the hospital. She was two floors up above from where the loud family parents were, looking for a specific doctor.

"Ah. Here we are…" the child prodigy came to the right door that seemed to be made of thick wood. The plaque on it read 'Dr Jerume's office'. Before she had a chance to knock, the door opened on its own, revealing a tall man with black hair, standing before her in a doctor's uniform.

"Oh, sorry kiddo… Lisa Loud? Is that you?" Dr. Jerume crouched down to be mostly on the child genius's level. The tall doctor was the one who had delivered most of the Loud children, Lincoln excluded since he had been born in the family van.

"Indeed, Jerume, it's been a long time. Hope I'm not interrupting something," Lisa greeted him. The two knew each other more than the Loud parents probably knew him. When she began working on getting her PhD, he gave her some important lessons of mistakes to avoid when it came to achieve it. He was like a teacher to her, even if he played a very small role.

"Well, you know I am. Your mother had a surprise baby, after all," Jerume had gotten the call already and was about to go pay a visit to check on the medical status of the supposed newborn and Rita herself.

"Yes… Can we talk privately? It won't take five minutes," Lisa requested, adjusting her glasses. He wanted to decline, but the child had an IQ higher than his. He knew she would not delay him from helping her own mother, unless it was important.

"Alright. Step on in," the middle-aged doctor let her step inside. He closed the door behind them. "So, what is it you wanted to talk with me about?"

"Do you remember the device I discussed with you months ago?" Lisa asked. When she began on the task, he was one of the first medical professionals she discussed the idea with. He was supportive of it, despite not being comfortable with the idea of essentially cloning organs.

"Of course. It was because your oldest sister nearly lost her liver, right? How's that project of yours been going?" Dr. Jerume hoped it was good news as he sat behind his desk, letting the young girl take the chair on the other side of the desk and stand on it, so he could see her.

"Unfortunately, it went far too well… I created life," Lisa said it outright and clear. He could be trusted with the information, as far as she believed.

" _Uh…_ Yeah…" the tall doctor rubbed his head, "Organs are alive, wouldn't be useful otherwise."

"The baby you were on your way to examine was born by said machine, due to an extreme error that ended in detonation," Lisa took off her glasses and pinched the bridge of her nose. She felt a large migraine coming on from the stress of today. There was a silence in the room after that.

"Heh… that's cute, Lisa, but I doubt we'll have technology able to do that in our lifetime," Dr. Jerume lightly chuckled. He never saw her as the type to tell jokes. Maybe she changed a little in the last half year since they last saw each other, he thought.

"I'm serious… this baby is entirely new-born. There is no umbilical cord, she shares similar characteristics of the two I acquired the genetic samples from too," Lisa continued to press her point, but it was clear to her that Jerume was uncertain. It would be something he would have to see for himself to believe.

"Why are you telling me this then? Are you trying to brag?" He jokingly asked, but got a nasty glare from her that made him go silent.

"See, I'm aware a lot of this hospital respects and trusts you… you can do a lot of things secretly. I would like to request you swap out genetic results from the testing I know you'll inevitably perform," Lisa declared, aware he would most likely perform the genetic test when he saw the baby without any traces of an umbilical cord.

"You praise me too much… But why do you want me to hide the results? That's what I'm curious about…"

"Because the genetic samples I used were from my only brother and oldest sister…" Lisa had no hesitation to explain the truth, "As I said, the test went far off target goal… we don't want them to be burdened with the news that this new-born is technically their daughter."

Understandably, the doctor was a bit overwhelmed by all this. "Look Lisa, I think it's sweet what you're doing, but I have to follow hospital policy. Any suspicion of incest or the likes has to be reported, and…"

The child prodigy knew he was not going to listen. It was time to use the special trick she had up her sleeve. Her patience had run thin, and she knew he probably thought she was partially deranged at the moment.

"How long have you been married, Dr. Jerume?"

"What? …fourteen years. Why?" the doctor raised an eyebrow, watching Lisa stretch a little.

"Because the last time I saw you when Lori was admitted, you had quite dedicated nurses… now half of them seem hesitant to go near you," the young girl hopped out of her seat and walked over to the window to look at the outside.

"They're nurses. They feel tense constantly since an emergency can happen at any moment," Dr. Jerume did not seem to acknowledge her point directly.

"Yes, and if the other doctors I know here are right… you have several sexual harassment claims laid out against you. Two of which have escalated to full blown lawsuits. It'd be quite an unfortunate coincidence if your wife got a letter full of evidence, as well as contact information for the nurses," Lisa left an indirect threat without breaking her straight face. Not even once, "Don't you think so, Dr. Jerume?"

"You're joking… right? She wouldn't believe a word you said…" Jerume doubted her bluff. No matter how high her intelligence was, he knew his wife would not believe someone so young making these wild claims.

"Perhaps not me… but if an _'anonymous'_ co-worker of yours did, then perhaps she would," Lisa responded, before she began heading for the door. She kept her head turned to him. "Do I have your cooperation?"

" _I'll do it…_ " he sighed and nodded after a short moment of silence. Lisa nodded back and walked out the door. Dr. Jerume stayed seated, looking ashamed of himself. "If this is what the next generation's going to be like… the future is either really screwed, or in really crafty hands…"

* * *

Lisa went right back to her parents when she had finished coercing the doctor into aiding her with her goal. They had now just admitted the Loud mother.

"How'd it go, Lisa?" the hopeful Lynn Sr. asked, seated by his wife's bedside. The makeup had done its job. Rita looked drained of all energy after giving birth, and her acting was on point as well.

"It was a small challenge, but I was able to convince him to aid us… You performed a wonderful job, mother," Lisa complimented her. The woman rubbed her daughter's head.

"Well, after having ten kids, it's impossible to forget the feeling," Rita exhaled, just glad that this act did not involve the pain of labor. Recalling that alone made her feel like she was truly losing energy.

"Where's the baby?" the child genius inquired, fixing her hair back. She hated it when it was messed with.

"Getting examined… having a baby with no prenatal care or the likes is something they're worried about," Lynn Sr. said. He was worried about it also. The lie about an unknown pregnancy may not be that far from the truth, given the concern they all had for the baby's health.

"Good… I'm sorry you had to do all this, just because of my own failure," Lisa apologized, her gaze again falling downward slightly.

"It's what family is for. To help each other when we need it… with a family as big as ours, we have a lot of help, too," Rita reassured. The young genius was picked up and pulled into a hug. Lisa enjoyed the feeling, despite not expressing it on her face too much. She had needed some form of emotional support, right now the hug was quite enough.

"I'd appreciate it if you promised to never try that experiment again though…" the balding middle-aged man requested,

"Your old man's not got much sanity left."

"Affirmative," Lisa nodded. She was already making plans on just burying the blueprints for the next twenty years. No, she then decided. Burying was not good enough. Burning was a more deserved fate for those drawings, the only place the schematics would remain is within her mind.

"I guess this makes you the second youngest in the family now," Rita giggled, while having Lisa in her lap.

" _I…_ suppose that's true," Lisa nodded, only realizing this herself. That was the last thing on her mind.

"Are we really going to keep this secret forever, though? I mean… we're not going to be around forever, I'd rather have less secrets with me when I'm buried," Lynn Sr. spoke. A thought that his wife and second youngest daughter had thought of over the course of this as well.

"Of course, not… nothing can be kept secret forever. It's a rule of life," the blonde middle-aged woman replied, but she was unsure how long they would or should keep it a secret.

"I say we wait until both Lincoln and Lori are far more mature, and we'll tell them when all three of us can agree that the time has come," Lisa suggested. That would be the best course of action to them. Her parents saw no problem there. Unless they were all agreed in unison, the secret would not be told.

"Do you hear something?" Rita asked the two of them. After a moment of focus, they could indeed hear the running of a large crowd shaking the floor slightly.

"Yep… looks like they're here," Lynn Sr. chuckled nervously. They knew this was the sound of their very family. The door flew open and the other nine siblings all flooded the room.

"Mom! Dad! Did you really have another baby?!"

"Is it a boy or a girl?"

"Are you okay mom? You look exhausted."

"Did you really not know you were pregnant?!"

"How's that even possible?"

"I guess you could say we were _'surprised'_ baby,"

"Luan, if you keep making puns that bad, I'm going to ask a doctor to put me in a coma."

"Where's the baby?"

"Did you think of a name yet?"

"Kids! Calm down!" Lynn Sr. ordered. They listened after remembering they were in a hospital. Such boisterousness could be annoying other patients.

"They're examining the baby now. It's a girl. No, we haven't thought of a name, and yes, I had no clue I was pregnant," Rita answered their questions back to back like it was nothing unusual.

" _Uh…_ sorry if I'm intruding," the doctor's voice grabbed their attention. They could see Dr. Jerume standing by the doorway. He could feel Lisa's reminding glare piercing him with minimal effort.

"No, no, it's fine. Tell us how's she doing?" the Loud father insisted, eager to hear the news like the rest of the Loud family were.

"We don't see anything too worrying. Seems her umbilical cord left no traces behind… though she'll have to be put on a ventilator for a day or two," the doctor explained. The last bit of the news made a lot of their hearts sink and made Lisa's mind race with her internal fear possibly coming true.

"What? Why?" the sports lover, Lynn Jr, requested an explanation. Whenever this was done, it tended to be a terrible thing.

"She's suffering from minor smoke inhalation. This'll help make sure she gets more oxygen. She's unable to take the deepest of breaths due to her size… granted, however, she's bigger than most newborns," Dr. Jerume reassured. It eased the families worries, but not by much. Lisa guessed that the O.R.D.'s detonation was what caused the smoke inhalation.

"Can we see her?" Lincoln asked. The doctor nodded.

"Yes. She's just at the end of this floors hallway with the other baby's under monitoring," Dr. Jerume said. He barely finished that sentence before most of the family left the room in a flash. Lincoln, Lisa and their parents though stayed behind.

"I think I'm gonna be sick…" Lincoln rubbed his head. He had been spun around like a top from his many sisters running past him so quickly. He only stayed here to make sure he was recovered before he tried to take another step.

"Thank you, Dr. Jerume," Lisa thanked the doctor as she went to help her sole brother. Jerume gave an exhausted groan before leaving.

"I'm just surprised that I have ten sisters now…" Lincoln commented. For some reason something in the back of his head was telling him there was going to be a lot more chaos at home now.

"At least this'll be an interesting story to tell your friends at school," Lynn Sr. assured, having similar thoughts to his son.

"I guess… We left the bowling alley in such a hurry that Clyde could barely tell," Lincoln panted, looking exhausted from the rush over to the hospital. Like his missing energy had finally caught up to him.

"Why don't you two go on and catch up with the others," Rita suggested. Their two children nodded before beginning to head off. The Loud parents were desperate to enjoy this moment of peace from how stressful today was thus far. They just hoped the hard part was over.

* * *

The brother and sister walked through the halls, in no need to be in as big of a rush as the rest of their family was. Both were exhausted, one from stress, and the other from overexertion.

"Lincoln… Can I ask you something?" the child prodigy started.

"Hm? Yeah, Lisa?" He stopped for her.

"Have you ever thought about what it'd be like to be a parent?" Lisa's question seemed quite random, but she guessed it was provoked by the birth of their newest sister.

"Not really… I haven't even been on a real date yet. It's really too early for me to be thinking about kids," Lincoln responded, though was not doubtful about some people thinking that far into the future.

"I see…" the spectacled toddler nodded as they continued walking.

"I'd like to think I'd be a good father, though… every time one of you were born, it felt great to help take care of you all," Lincoln followed up by saying that. Guessing it felt like being a secondary parent to his sisters. Some of them saw Luna that way also.

"I'm fairly certain you'll be a great father one day as well… just hope you have more luck with protection than our father has had," Lisa ended her compliment with a rather off handed comment. It seemed like a cheap shot at their father.

"What?" Lincoln chirped.

"What?" she parroted while pretending to be oblivious. Silence took over from there as they continued onward to go view the newborn with the rest of their sisters. When they arrived, they could see everyone viewing their new sister through the window fawning over her.

"She is a bit bigger than the other babies."

"She looks like Lincoln when he was first born."

"She's a lot more content than Lucy was when she was born."

"Don't need memories of that…"

"I hope the ventilator doesn't hurt her."

"Don't worry. She's probably too tired to even realize it's there."

"Come on now, no need to be _'babies'_ about it."

"I'm about to cry like one with how bad your puns are."

"Don't we need to think of a name?" Leni butted in. Everyone had been lost looking at their newborn sister that they had forgot she had no name yet.

"I suppose the best name would be one starting with an L. Just like the rest of our names," Lisa claimed, that seemed to be an unsaid rule in their family for some reason. The sisters were then quick to brainstorm.

"Oh, hey! How about Ligala?"

"That sounds too foreign…"

"Why not a princess name like Leah?"

"She doesn't look like a Leah,"

"How does someone _'look'_ like a name?"

"I dunno but I agree with her,"

"How about Lauren?"

"Why not Leo?"

"She's not a boy, Lana… then again, three of my classmates in sixth grade were girls and all three of them were named Keith."

"How's Leith sound?"

"No."

"Nu-uh."

"Definitely not!"

"Don't even joke like that…"

"Y'know, dad always said something after each one of you were born," Lori claimed. They all looked to her like she had hit upon an idea.

"What's that?" Lola questioned.

"Whenever one of you was born, he would say, _'another flower ready to bloom'_ ," Lori explained, just like that, they all seemed to come up with the same name on the spot.

"Lily Loud! That's perfect!"

"Yeah! It's just as cute as she is."

"I'm sure mom and dad'll agree."

Lisa was happy to see everyone so overjoyed. She thought it was best to let the secret remain. She had doubts at first, but Lincoln and Lori's reactions alone reaffirmed her thoughts. "I wonder which one's going to race to tell mom and dad first?" she laughed to herself. Even she was feeling overly energetic since this newborn had now been officially brought into this family, even if it was in an odd circumstance overall.

* * *

Those next two days flew by like the wind. Everything had gone according to plan. Not one problem arose. Lisa felt a lot more relieved with every passing test result that came back with nothing threatening the baby internally, though they would not know if she had any mental or developmental issues. Only time would tell. Lisa and her parents did feel bad however about keeping this secret, but they knew it was for the best to make it stay that way for now.

The family were all loaded up into Vanzilla with the old car seat for the baby. The baby seat had been dragged out from the basement of the Loud house. Lynn Sr. had to rummage around a bit to find it, but was able to after a while. The Loud parents never threw out any of their children's baby stuff, it helped a lot more then they expected.

"I guess she'll be set up in the younger kids' room... That alright, Lola, Lana, Lisa?" Rita asked while she made sure the car seat the baby carrier was hooked onto was buckled right.

"Sounds good," Lola nodded.

"Of course!" Lana grinned eagerly.

"Certainly," Lisa agreed. It seemed only they could handle the inevitable late-night crying that would begin coming from their room, even if Luna would be the one to respond to the noise.

"Hey, isn't that Dr. Jerume?" Lucy asked, directing everybody's attention to the other part of the parking lot. There they saw the scene of the doctor running circles around his car, a clearly upset woman was tearing it apart with her keys while running from him.

" _Ohh…_ " Lori reacted, "That's a revenge keying if I've ever seen one."

"And the look of a broken marriage," Leni added as they all watched. Lynn Sr. simply began driving away, not even willing to acknowledge it. Lisa was smiling to herself though, having been the one to cause this.

"Lessons must be learned quite harshly, sometimes," the child prodigy hummed, much to everyone's confusion, but they barely paid attention to that. She was looking over the new baby, Lily Loud. Everyone agreed to the name without a doubt. The Loud parents were okay with the family's newest member, and just hoped she would be alright.

"Well, Lily… I knew our family would grow one day, but I never anticipated it'd be in such an odd way… I hope you love us as much as we'll love you," Lisa tried to relax for the car ride. The big stress of the day was over. She was now the second youngest of the Loud house, and it was a change that she would easily get used to. All she had to worry about now was cleaning the mess left in the younger girls room and burning some blueprints.

* * *

 **A/N: Well, that's the end of my first one shot. I will make more, but I don't want to make one of those compilation things where all one shots would go. I would want the one shots to be able to stand on their own strengths, without leeching off one another basically. Or that's how I see it. I'm sorry if this is terrible, I hope soon I can start my first fanfic. Let me know what you thought.**


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